ain ashiqin
1159@270293
sixteen
ohana
rgsrcy
I want school work to go away,
And never come another day.
Let all my yearmates come and stay;
We'd talk and laugh and shop and play.
And if we were about to pay,
The boss'd say, "Oh, it's okay."
But nothing's ever what I say...
If only things would go my way.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Sigh okay so the first week just passed like that. Two weeks left.
Went to my cousin's/grandparents' house today. I didn't really do anything much other than sit around listening to my mum and the aunties talking in the kitchen when I could drag my bum off the bed in my cousin's bedroom.
Argh loads of things on my holiday schedule, and it's so irritating because I have yet to start on my PTs. But it requires so much discipline that I cannot make myself work, thanks to the rebellious part of my brain. Sigh and the pressure today... my relatives kept comparing schools with mine and it was rather stressing. I mean they don't know, they all assume that it's damn easy in this school, and I can't blame them because I can't be bothered to explain to them. It's too complex, and requires too much talking on my part. Haha, but they just don't know.
Anyway, I was just browsing my folders on my computer when I came across some interesting material back from when I was in Primary 5. We had to do this assignment where all of us had to write a poem on 'If I were a Wealthy Person'.
Rereading my poem felt really weird, though in a way I wasn't able to identify. I had sort of forgotten how worried I was that my teacher would leave the school like she said she would the previous year. I mean like, before that, two of my favourite teachers left, one after another, so I was really hoping all the time that this teacher wouldn't leave either. And when I suddenly recall how scared to my insides I was to have to miss yet another close person, it was like a sudden jolt. It's like, I'm scared of lonliness as well. Not just attention, darkness, water, heights and whatever. Lonliness, and I only just realised.
If I were a rich woman,
I’d be willing to give away all my property,
So that my teacher would continue teaching
At this school on the second of January.
And I remember being close to tears writing that last paragraph. I really meant it.
i'm still here.
11:51 pm
